I Shouldn’t Be Who I Am. The art and persuasion of learning to see yourself.

A fatal wound to your soul changes your focus, teaches you to deny your very existence, and keeps you in the fight or flight zone. I am the writer and author of A Prisoner by No Crime of My Own. Incest. Rape. Murder. Then, I Turned Four. You can imagine I emerged from childhood only focused on others out of repetitive safety measures with the inability to see that I had power to change or choose anything. Focusing on others always brings the same result – people are unsafe, not trustworthy and always my problem. This way of thinking left me a victim. Throughout my life, I’ve had the ability to find hope. A hope that was reasonable and kept me on the path of discovery. I want to explore that hope with the audience. I’m a high achieving person in life and should not be who I am. I’ve put years of effort into developing and changing who my past created me to be. In my fifties, a stranger sat down at my table. He introduced himself then asked me for a piece of paper and something to write with. I gave him what I had – an eyeliner pencil and an electric bill waded up in my purse. He wrote down U C U. Then, he got up and walked away. The message of U C U (you see you) changed me dramatically. Angelic messengers seem to have helped me since my childhood. While all people don’t experience severe childhood trauma, we all need to be able to see ourselves clearly, defined, and follow hope. If you’ve told yourself you aren’t going to make it, I’m here to share how you can.